Most people with low self-esteem have earned it. George Carlin, 29. } else { One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. He was an American standup comedian. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. If the parent corporation doesnt want you to know something, it wont be on the news. The upper class keeps all of the money, pays none of the taxes. Lists. One can never know for sure what a deserted area can look like. Quotes by George Carlin One of the most iconic comedians of all time. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.George Carlin, I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. He's the subject of a new documentary. One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. George Carlin, 51. Your dog thinks you're a god. All rights reserved. They all said: 'Try to live together peacefully.' Im sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. George Carlin, 27. And a list of people they're going to visit at 3am. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control peoples language with strict codes and rigid rules. George Carlin, 60. The Catholic Church alone could wipe out the national debt if all you did was tax their real estate.George Carlin, In America, anyone can become president. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. Maybe this time itll work. George Carlin, Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointedidealist. George Carlin, Never argue with an idiot. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice., Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups., If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else., Political correctness cripples discourse, creates ugly language and is generally stupid., Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out., When I hear a person talking about political solutions, I know I am not listening to a serious person., If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders., If you have selfish and ignorant citizens then you too will become a selfish and bad leader.. They should be more vivid. Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. George Denis Patrick Carlin was born May 12, 1937, in the Bronx, New York. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("grsession", "osid.b75ee1b4ab41ae6cecc3e4c769a5b3df"); "Events.SushiEndpoint": "https://unagi.amazon.com/1/events/com.amazon.csm.csa.prod", Because theres no money in that problem. George Carlin, If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. George Carlin, Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?George Carlin, Electricity is really just organized lightningGeorge Carlin, Would a fly without wings be called a walk?George Carlin, There are women named Faith, Hope, Joy, and Prudence. 3. Topics. return cookiePair[1]; Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. Seems like a big waste of time to me! Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. Men are often so foolish as to boast and value themselves upon their passions, even those that are most vicious. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Interview with Todd Leopold, edition.cnn.com. setDisplayBids: function() {}, If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. When you die, it all stays here. Your email address will not be published. George Carlin quotes on the American government In America, anyone can become president. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. The following quotes are some of the most thought provoking sentences youll ever read. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Its a great feeling. 2. Carlin and his older brother, Pat, were primarily raised by their mother in Manhattan's Morningside Heights neighborhood. I just dont have as many people who believe it.George Carlin, How come when its us, its an abortion, and when its a chicken, its an omelet?George Carlin. It is one that we need to function as a society. pubID: '3211', adServer: 'googletag', bidTimeout: 4e3, params: { aps_privacy: '1YN' } , We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. ' George Carlin, 30. session: { id: "334-5362882-2183381" }, We all need to let loose and laugh at things once in a while and making other people laugh as well as think and find meaning behind your jokes is an exceptional talent George Carlin has. We just believed everything. In America, anyone can become president. I think that speaks for itself. Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. Here are some of our favorite George Carlin quotes on politics. [CDATA[ Those who decide what news you will or will not hear are paid by, and tolerated purely at the whim of, those who hold economic power. g = p.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; Pictures. George Carlin Quotes Government George Carlin American Comedian born on May 12, 1937, died on June 22, 2008 George Denis Patrick Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, actor, and author. George Carlin, The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, 42. If you can connect with theseGeorge Carlin quotes, subscribe to our blog so that you dont miss a single post. Being considered as one of the top comedians of all time,George is well known for his black humor, political views, observations on language, psychology, and religion along with many other taboo subjects. You have owners. If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. }()); He was a true outspoken man that we can emulate in many ways. A.src = t; } It takes up a lot of your time. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. And fight songs. George Carlin was one of the most iconic comedians of all time and he had a lot to say about government. He loves you and he needs money. They're always people who tell us to live together in harmony and try to love one another: Jesus, Ghandi, Lincoln, John Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, Medgar Evers, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, John Lennon. Really? } Thats the problem. George Carlin, 58. Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean the circus has left town. George Carlin, 23. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. for(var i=0; i George Carlin, Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.George Carlin, I, myself, have killed six people. I'm the Founder of SucceedFeed.com and I truly appreciate you taking the time to read my posts and being apart of the Succeed Feed community. If you can find a solution to homelessness where the corporations and politicians can make a few million dollars each, you will see the streets of America begin to clear up pretty damn quick! George Carlin, 67. Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. window.csa("Config", { A comedian can say things that you may not want to hear but need to. born on May 12, 1937, It can help you a lot.George Carlin, Isnt making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?George Carlin, I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. The planet is fine. They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. We think in language. War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle-class and lower-class men off to die. George Carlin, 78. Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. What do you get at the end of it? "George Carlin confronts reality". googletag.cmd = googletag.cmd || []; Good, honest, hard-working people: white collar, blue collar, it doesn't matter what color shirt you have on. I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. }); }); Question it, and try to see the world for what it actually is, as opposed to what someone or some company or some organization or some government is trying to represent it as, or present it as, however they've mislabeled it or dressed it up or told you. I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. George Carlin, 16. Keep em showing up at those jobs. George Carlin, 81. The Grammy-Award-winning star of 14stand-up comedy specials on HBO taught us the power of words and how a person can use humor as a weapon. You know why? George Carlin. Never argue with an idiot. Thats the problem.George Carlin, Let a smile be your umbrella, and youll end up with a face full of rain. Boy, these conservatives are really something, arent they? You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. George Carlin, 70. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat. By the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. Now you can finally see what made George Carlin the dad tick. George Carlin was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, after he passed away that year at the age of 71. I think the life cycle is all backwards. The planet is fine. Required fields are marked *. Couldnt you just skip the praying part and go right to His Will? He was the second onComedy Centrals list of top 10 American comedians in 2004, posthumously awarded theMark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, and ranked second in number on the list of the 50 best stand-up comedians of all time by Rolling Stonemagazine in 2017. A person of good intelligence and of sensitivity cannot exist in this society very long without having some anger about the inequality and its not just a bleeding-heart, knee-jerk, liberal kind of a thing it is just a normal human reaction to a nonsensical set of values where we have cinnamon flavored dental floss and there are people sleeping in the street. George Carlin, 68. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.' George Carlin Believe, Government, Rules To Live By 48 Copy quote Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. And apparently Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.George Carlin, Im completely in favor of theseparation of Church and State. These two institutions screw us up enoughon their own, so both of them together iscertain death.George Carlin, I dont have pet peeves I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.George Carlin, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.George Carlin, If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Its important in life if you dont give a shit. Cause pretty soon they have little hats. } I sincerely believe that if you think theres a solution, youre part of the problem. } He is a sucker for good coffee, Indian food, and video games. All you had to do was suspend the logic and reasoning you were being taught in all the other classes. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Laugh often, long and loud. George Carlin was no stranger to controversy. I dont believe anything the government tells me., Governments dont want well-informed, well-educated people capable of critical thinking. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. They own all the important land. The poor are just there just to scare the shit out of the middle class. If viewers had discretion, most television shows would not be on the air. George Carlin, 54. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("resource", "author_22782"); Because you have the illusion of choice! George Carlin, 76. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Life is a zero sum game. George Carlin, 36. If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin, 32. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. You have no choice. How are YOU going to tackle today? Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? We dont even know how to take care of ourselves; we havent learned how to care for one another. Thats exactly what I want you to think. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. fetchBids: function() { My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Quotes. //

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